PEACE BRIDGE
The Peace Bridge is a tool to help people communicate, clarify thoughts, build empathy, expand understanding, heal hurts, while being heard and validated in a non-judgmental format.
When to use the Bridge: I have only used the Bridge once everyone has had an opportunity to calm down some. It is pretty impossible for anyone to think rationally when their emotions are heightened, so once everyone has had an opportunity to level out then I would introduce the Peace Bridge. This could be 20 minutes out of a situation or two days later or at the end of the school day.
Find a time and space that is going to work for all the participants.
How to Use the Bridge: There is a facilitator, this can be an adult or older child who is prepped and prepared to support people on the bridge. The role of the facilitator is to acknowledge the intention of the Bridge, which is to hear each others experience acknowledging that each person’s experience is their truth. There is no right or wrong on the Bridge we are just walking it to better understand what has happened and what needs to happen to heal and create a social understanding that is based on understanding and not fear. If we can reach an understanding at the end of the walk -great and if we need more time we can come back to it on another day.
Explain that they will be invited to take turns speaking on the bridge and while the other person is speaking, the listener will be listening and then asked to paraphrase back what they heard. If the speaker feels like the listener heard them correctly then thank them and invite the listener to become the speaker and speaker to become the listener.
Follow those steps through the 3 parts of the Bridge.
Participants can have a friend or adult walk the steps of the bridge beside them if they want support. The support person does not speak during this process but just offers their presence. If you are doing it with a group then others can sit the edge of the bridge and witness the process quietly.
If you have any questions about the Bridge contact me and I will set up a time to call you and answer any questions you might have.
Why I love the Bridge
John Gottman states that '69% of all conflict in relationship is perpetual" Which means that we need to be teaching children how to manage through conflict rather than relying on the model of designating a bully and a victim. The Peace Bridge is a tool that kids can make themselves and that parents and educators can access to model a way through conflict without judgement. I have used it in classrooms and with my own kids for years. I think it is a lovely way to introduce a communication model to our children.